awkward & awesome thursday

[lips: Maybelline ColorSensational Rebel Bloom Lipstick in Coral Burst (740)]

AWKWARD

...my bangs. No one recognizes me now which is suuuuuuper awkward.

...The Rock's dialogue in Furious 7. "Don't make me break your finger six different ways and stick it where the sun don't shine!" Please, Dwayne Johnson, leave my fingers alone.

...the guy in my leasing office asking me if I want to go do CrossFit with him. "Oh, no thanks, I just am going to go run on the treadmill super slowly... Byeeeee..."

...I ate an apple yesterday without rinsing it first. #goodbyecruelworld #ripcourteney

...when your Amazon Prime order arrives in 100 separate extra large boxes. "What's in the boxxxxxxx?"

AWESOME

...my bangs. My ponytails are awesome as f*ck now. (Please see above photo feat. said ponytail)

...the guy that was in our theater seeing Furious 7 last night who screamed at the top of his lungs, "YES! GOD DAMN! YES!" during a particularly awesome scene.

...clients canceling meetings at the last minute (why, yes, instead I would like to slack off this afternoon, thank you for asking).

...new iPhone emojis! Although, there's still no middle finger emoji. Come on, man!

...my little brothers are coming in town for the weekend! 

"Confidence comes from amazing outfits and perfect make up." -Laverne Cox's Sheena in The Mindy Project

Can we just spend a few minutes (like maybe 30? I'm not known for my brevity...) talking about all the amazing things that are happening in the entertainment world right now? 

Better Call Saul

This is a geeky lawyer's dream (are there any lawyers who aren't geeky...?). That's really all there is to say about it. Well, that, and it's a lot less oh-good-God-I'm-depressed than Breaking Bad.

Insurgent

So, this was definitely better than the book (whaaaaat), but it was still horribly cheesy. Also, Theo James is not shirtless nearly enough. I'll give it a C, but let it be known that the film would be a solid B+ if there was more of that man meat running around. ALSO, MILES TELLER. A friend of mine told me he's an asshole in real life, but GUYS, I refuse to believe it because he's my favorite human ever (sorry, real life boyfriend).

The Mindy Project

GAHHHH the finale was perfection. And can we talk about the penultimate episode that featured Laverne Cox? Seriously, I haven't laughed that hard in a very, very long time. My favorite moment (which just so happens to describe exactly how I feel about babies) was when Sheena said:

"So Tamara tells me you're pregnant. You need to be careful. Babies are shady. They steal your youth and beauty and keep it for their own damn selves." 

I re-watched that episode while typing this post, and I have huge tears in my eyes. COMEDIC PERFECTION. If this show isn't renewed for another season I'm going to start a petition (can someone tell me where to send in said petition...?). 

The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry

My friend Kassie suggested this book for our book club, and when she first told us the title, I rolled my eyes. Here I am, a month later, trying to pry my foot out of my mouth. This is the best book I've read in the past few years. I thought about including a brief synopsis here, but trust me, it's better if you have no clue what the plot is, and you just dive right in. 

Does anyone have any book recommendations? Preferably ones written by female authors? I just finished The Girl on the Train, too, and whoo! What. a. ride. (a ride... on a train... BADUM-CHH)

A REMAKE OF SHE'S ALL THAT IS IN THE WORKS?

I hope Freddie Prinz Jr. plays the sexy dad. Me-ow.

(Also, rest in peace, Paul Walker. Anyone want to go see Furious 7 with me...?)

ALSO also, I made my real life boyfriend (see above reference to said human) watch She's All That for the first time a few months ago, and he was utterly flabbergasted. NOTHING is better than the hacky sack scene. NOTHING, YOU HEAR ME?!

The Jinx

I just started this last night, yes I know, I'm way behind. All I have to say is this: that f*cking guy has black eyes. His irises are black. Also, this reminded me: HBO Now just launched! Should I sign up? Entertainment nerds, give me advice!

Saved By The Bell...

...in its entirety is on Netflix. You're welcome.

Please tell me all the fun things you've been watching/reading lately because I'm a glutton, and I want to consume all the entertainment humanly (or inhumanly) possible.